Remember when you used to fantasize about how great it would be to be married? In our fantasies, the majority of us most likely believed marriage as a wonderful thing … but realistically, we know it’s not going to be like that all of the time.
Sure, there will be times when marriage will require some hard work, and there could even be times when leaving might be considered.
Marriage, just as any relationship, can have it’s ups and downs. Also, as in any other relationship, a successful marriage is only possible if both partners are prepared to put in the work.
Love has to be nurtured and requires action in order to continue to grow and thrive.
Do you feel like your marriage has stalled? Have you stopped investing in growing a relationship that is fulfilling for both of you? Are you trying to figure out how to save your marriage from divorce? Want to find out how to fall back in love with your partner?
If this sounds like you, here are 8 tips to strengthen and (possibly) help save your marriage.
How to Save Your Marriage
Disagreements are natural any time there are two or more people involved in a situation.
When you have two people living together, doing life together every day, there’s an even greater chance there will be times when they don’t see eye-to-eye.
Learning how to truly forgive, and not hold grudges, is essential if you want to move forward without anger and animosity from seeping into the marriage.
Everyone makes mistakes. In a marriage, we should be able to admit wrong-doing and offer apologies, as well as be quick to forgive ourselves and our partner. Then, it’s time to find a pathway forward, without harboring grudges, because that resolves nothing.
- Respect and Honesty
Don’t take your partner for granted. Learn to say “thank you” often and express your gratitude for things your spouse does for you.
Always be truthful. One lie often leads to another and can spiral out of control. It rarely ends well for your marriage.
If there is a problem, talk to your spouse about it; don’t bottle it up. Couples that communicate their problems and talk through even the most minute things are the ones more likely to cultivate a strong, loving marriage.
- Laugh often
Life in and of itself can make every little thing seem mundane and monotonous. As a married couple, you should be able to share silly stories or simple jokes to decrease stress and tension of the daily grind.
Remember, it’s been said that “laughter is the best medicine.” Try it and see if it improves your daily mindset and moves you closer to salvaging your marriage.
It’s hard to stress how important good communication is to a lasting, fulfilling marriage.
Don’t let things simmer below the surface. If one spouse is feeling upset by something the other half has said or done, speak up now. One should never assume the other knows exactly what is wrong. What might be obvious to one, might not be noticeable to the other!
As partners, you should be able to openly and freely discuss what it on your mind, good or bad, with your spouse. The key to a great marriage is communication.
- Make joint decisions
There’s a saying in marriage that references “when two become one“. It references the way the marriage blends each partner into one physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
Therefore, when it comes to things like finances, children, education, parenting, delegation of household duties, and so on, you should be able to agree on and make joint decisions. One spouse should not be superior over the other.
If you can’t reach an arrangement quickly, think about it for some time and come back to it again.
Listen to your partner’s opinions on the matter and consider each point. Learn to compromise.
Marriage isn’t a competition and shouldn’t be a daily battle either.
- Focus on the positives
Remember what made you fall in love in the first place. Focus on the good things you saw in your partner. Be intentional about having positive interactions with your spouse each day and not getting caught up in the negative.
Cultivate an attitude of gratitude towards your spouse rather than harboring feelings of resentment, anger, or animosity. Focus on what you love about your partner rather than what frustrates you.
Notice the small things and celebrate all the good things in your marriage, no matter how big or small. It may sound simple, but you’ll start to see how changing your mindset can improve your marriage.
- Show love
Love is a choice you make each day — and never stop. Love is movement towards one another, even through the chaos of this life.
Love is a verb. Make sure you put yours into action every day.
- Nurture your flame
Intimacy grows in a marriage when there is a strong commitment to each other.
Everyone experiences things differently when it comes to intimacy. When you’re with the person you feel you’re meant to be with, it opens up the door to a new kind of sexual freedom.
Make time to foster a better emotional connection, that will then create good sex. You can rekindle the flame by rekindling the friendship.
How to Strengthen Your Marriage
No one said being married was easy; and if they did they’re most likely lying. One look at the divorce rate in America can prove that. But, it doesn’t have to be a constant struggle.
Can you save your marriage alone?
When both spouses understand they have each other to hold on to, and they’re willing to make an effort, marriage can be be a gratifying connection for everyone involved.
Partners have to make the commitment to be there for each other, “for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part.”
DIY Marriage Retreat
Are you both committed to doing the work to save your marriage? Do you feel like you’re not yet ready for marriage counseling, but want to take a step towards resolution? Maybe you want to try a marriage retreat, but want to work in a private setting?
Try a DIY Marriage Retreat.
With a self-guided marriage retreat, you can:
- Identify pain points
- Initiate honest communication
- Reconnect and Restore
- Work, in private, at your own pace
Rebuild the foundation of your relationship, restore your marriage, and rekindle the romance with our DIY Marriage Retreat course.
Get access to 8 marriage modules, accompanying worksheets, 44-page workbook, and more for only $47 with our easy marriage retreat online.