Creating a Successful Co-Parenting Plan: Tips for Putting Your Children First
Co-parenting is when divorced or separated parents continue to raise their children together even when they’ve parted ways.
Rather than two parents taking each other to court to get custody of their children, they work together to do what is best for their young ones.
Co-parenting may not be as easy to execute due to the resentment, as well as feelings of competitiveness, misunderstanding, and frustration between the ex-partners.
While it has its fair share of challenges, you can create a successful co-parenting plan that puts your children first.
Creating a Successful Co-parenting Plan
There’s a lot that goes into creating a successful co-parenting plan.
This includes finding the perfect balance between family life, your and your ex-partner’s emotions, and your child’s best interests.
Understand what’s best for your children
The ideal co-parenting plan should address your children’s education, finances, visitation schedule, holidays and special events, and medical needs or concerns. It should also have guidelines for decision-making and dispute resolution.
Moreover, the plan should include backup arrangements in case your children need to stay home from school or child care: that could mean talking to your ex-partner about how they can help out. You can discuss this face-to-face, via call, or by email.
Every family is different, and your parenting skills and schedule must be aligned with the needs of your children as well as your and your partner’s personal/professional lives.
Create a Schedule that Works
Your co-parenting schedule will dictate your ex-partner’s and children’s new routine and give you both an idea of how much time your children will spend with you and your co-parent. It is crucial to come up with a schedule that truly works for both parties and stick to it.
A lot of family courts suggest that parents divide the time equally. Generally referred to as a 50/50 parenting schedule, this schedule can be split in many ways.
Once you both have mutually decided on a schedule, you should agree on what happens if either party needs to change it or has a change in future circumstances.
Have a Communication Plan
Many marriages fail due to a lack of communication, so normally, divorced parents struggle with being effective communicators.
For the well-being of your children, you must create more productive and open communication channels, including talking on the phone, contacting via email, and interacting face-to-face.
Don’t use your children as go-betweens or stress them out by making them the messenger. If you have a hard time directly contacting your ex-partner, use other modes of communication like text or email.
Part of effective communication is ensuring that what you say is received the way you intended, which may be a little difficult through email or text. If your ex says something frustrating, consider taking some time to cool off before replying.
Besides communicating with your ex-partner, it is also crucial to communicate with your children while they are away. A daily phone call or video chat is an easy way to make the distance feel less intense.
Decide How You Will Cover Your Child’s Finances
Divorced couples are normally held responsible for their children’s finances to a certain extent. Be clear about what your child support will cover.
A good tip is maintaining a running tab of child-related expenses to keep a written record of what was spent.
A Successful Co-Parenting Plan is Possible
Creating a successful co-parenting plan requires a lot of thought and effort. While it may be difficult, it can prove fruitful for your entire family and help everyone be on the same page about supporting your child or children.
If you and your ex-partner are struggling to devise a plan that puts your child first, consider connecting with a divorce lawyer or child custody attorney who can assist with your situation.