Why I Tell My Husband He’s Fat

First, before anyone throws rocks at me, I don’t really tell Colby he’s “fat.” I really only use that word to describe myself. No one else. And even then, I have to do so with care because giving my girls any sort of weight complex is definitely not a goal of mine. After Jaden’s battle with anorexia at 7 (due to anxiety, not body image) our eyes were opened to the world of eating disorders.

Colby's sad face on Snapchat

Back to Colby, I don’t tell him he’s fat.

This guy is my world. I have loved him since I was 16 years old, and even though we’ve been through some things, he is still my everything. We have worked side-by-side daily for the past 4 years and have been raising our kids together for the past 21+ years. I still look at him with coveting eyes and we like to gross our kids out daily, if you know what I mean. But it’s for these very reasons that I did have to make myself have a tough talk with Colby this year.

Hurting his feelings are never my intentions. Well, any more than most married people when we think we need to push buttons. But, it actually took me a while to get the courage up to ask Colby to “get healthy.”

daddy and his mini-me

I could care less what Colby looks like. I fell in love with a scrawny 15 year old boy and still adore the heart and soul of who he is. I know I’ve gained my fair share of weight over the years as well. Birthing 5 children can often do that to a person.

Therefore, with Colby, we talked about all the reasons I need him to be healthy. The most important being that I need him to live forever! There is no way I want to imagine doing life without him by my side. Second, I want him to be around to watch the kids grow — and they tend to agree that’s important as well.

Joeli with her daddy

Beyond those two reasons, the rest is secondary. Yes, there are great benefits to being in better shape, but he has to be alive to experience any of those. So, his health takes precedence.

In the past 6 weeks, after I once again laid down the gauntlet and told him I was serious, he has been eating better and working out habitually. He gets up early every morning and goes to the gym and is actually enjoying the routine. In fact, he even got me to join him this past week.

Colby at the gym

I hate the gym for several reasons: other people, sweat, the need to shower AGAIN, people, sweat. I mean, I know I can’t be the only one. Fortunately, we live in a a small-ish town and there are typically only 5 to 6 people at the gym when we go. That’s enough to have THAT ONE GUY who just sits on the ONE recumbent gym in the small gym and just look at his phone. No pedaling. Just sitting when I really want to get on and ride for about 4 miles. Anyways, that’s a whole other story! Check my Snapchat for live gym updates like this guy here.

All of this to say, Colby is down about 15 pounds so far and working to lose more every day. His dedication has actually just blown me away. It was honestly very tough for me to open up about my fears with him. One, saying them out loud is never fun. And, two, I was very emotional about it and didn’t want to upset him as well. But, he is my very best friend in the world and understood my reasons and knew I was asking in love. I am extremely blessed to have the relationship I do with my husband and am enjoying this new wellness journey with him.

Colby and I at the Arch in Cabo San Lucas

The best way to follow the transformation is on Instagram since he likes posting selfies — I like posting pictures of him!

Please feel free to leave your weight loss tips, words of encouragement, or own stories in the comments. He and I are on this trip together and are striving for a healthier lifestyle together!


365 Days of Gratitude

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