If you’re reading this, there’s a high chance you’ve been offered a job offer abroad. Either that or you’re just curious! If you do get offered a job, should you take it? This is one of the trickiest life decisions as there is so much to consider.
Firstly, is the job permanent? Some people are given a contract overseas for a year or two, then they can return home.
It might be that you have to work in another country for the duration of a project. In other cases, the job is very much permanent.
There are many questions running through your head, but one of the biggest ones is: what will this do to my marriage? Is it a good idea to work in another country, what do I need to take into consideration?
Living apart from your spouse & family
Taking a job in another country could mean you have to live apart from your family for some time. Especially if it’s a temporary job abroad, or if your partner doesn’t want to move away.
Are you able to do this? Can you sustain a marriage when you work in a different country?
It sounds absurd, but some families actually live like this. One person works abroad, but they come home every few months to see the family. It’s unfair to force your spouse to leave their life because of your job.
Yes, you’re doing it to support the family, but your wife may have a job, your kids may have friends in school – it’s a huge change for everyone.
Consider the emotional strain of living apart from your spouse as well – not to mention the physical side of your relationship.
Ironically, this can reignite some passion when you see each other again; it depends on the relationship.
Ultimately, you have to consider if your marriage will last when you work in one country and your spouse is in another.
Moving to a new country
The other option is to pack your bags and move your family to a new country. This gets rid of all the problems relating to a long-distance relationship, but it does throw up some other concerns.
Firstly, what’s the visa situation like? If you need one yourself, that means the whole family will need one too. I know what you’re thinking, does this mean I need a spouse visa for my wife?
No, it will probably be a different one related to work or family, so you can all live in a new country together.
Aside from this, you then have to consider how your spouse will deal with their new life. They may love it and prosper under all the new opportunities, and the same goes for your kids.
Or, everyone could hate it and resent you, ending the marriage as they flee back home.
All in all, this is a decision you can’t make on a whim. The best approach is to look at either of these two situations and weigh up the pros and cons of each.
If you can’t see more pros than cons in either one, it’s a sign that your marriage won’t survive you taking a job abroad. In which case, is it worth doing it?
my marriage rocks.
Sign up for our newsletter and we'll send you a printable list of 34 positive marriage affirmations.